Anger – Is It Nature Or Nurture?

Anger – Is It Nature Or Nurture?

‘If a small thing has the power to make you angry,  does that not indicate something about your size?’  ~Sydney J. Harris A negative belief is simply a negative thought connected to a negative feeling. There are several layers of beliefs; Core Beliefs Base Beliefs Compulsion Beliefs Assumption Beliefs Negative Predictions Antagonist Beliefs Fear Beliefs Antagonist Beliefs are formed when as children we are denied what we need or want and...

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“Love And Other Bruises”

“Love And Other Bruises”

“Love and other bruises didn’t have to choose us, but it did and I’m alive and I’m trying to survive” Air Supply Why does something that once felt so good now feel so terrible? That feeling of incredible love you felt when you first met the one your believed was ‘the one’. You know, ‘the one’  you believed would make you happy, support you and be there for you for the rest of your life? ‘The one’ you adored,...

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You Just Broke Your Child’s Heart!!!

You Just Broke Your Child’s Heart!!!

The Negative Things Adults Say To Children. Here are just some of the shocking negative things that adults say to children, I have collected hundreds of these put-downs, criticisms and  threats over the years I have been working with clients. Some are so shocking just the thought of having to hear them from a parents mouth is enough to make you shudder! One client’s mother told him every day from the time he was two years old “You are a...

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How To Stop Arguing in Just 5 Minutes!!

How To Stop Arguing in Just 5 Minutes!!

“I Have To Be Right” You know something really weird? Ever since I got rid of my ‘I have to be right’  beliefs way back in 90’s, I’ve had this thought most days. “If every person on this earth eliminated the belief “I have to be right” the world as we know it would change overnight”.  Wars, arguments and crime would stop. They would have to because all we are fighting for is ‘to be...

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In The Beginning Was The Word and the Word Was WHY?

In The Beginning Was The Word and the Word Was WHY?

                Your toddler hits four and it seems the only word ‘Little Miss or Master Inquisitor’ knows is WHY? “WHY do birds eat worms?” “WHY have cats got whiskers?” “WHY do flowers die?” “WHY does the sun go out at night?” “WHY are there holes in my cheese?” “WHY are peas and broccoli green?” “WHY is Daddy going away?” “WHY can’t I wear my wellies to bed?”  If...

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‘Miss Goody Two-Shoes’

‘Miss Goody Two-Shoes’

‘Miss Goody Two-Shoes’ The role Cynthia’s chose for herself in her family was ‘Miss Goody Two-Shoes’.  She learned early in childhood to protect her place in the family by becoming ‘Mummy’s Little Helper’.  Always ready to run errands, stack toys, mediate in arguments and look after her younger sibling, and in her teens became the ‘go-between’ her parents. As the ‘good girl’ she got lots of positive attention. The...

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