What Makes You Angry? – Part 1
"You Make Me Really Angry!"
Why are people so angry, what makes us angry and why do some of us have little or no control over our anger? As children we get angry for many different reasons, here are some of them;
- We don’t get what we want when we want it
- We are not heard
- We are rejected
- We are ignored or neglected
- We don’t get the attention we want
- We feel unloved and unwanted
- We feel we don’t belong or fit in
- We are punished for something we didn’t do
- We get physically and emotionally abused
- We feel helpless, powerless and controlled
- We have no choice
- We don’t get to win
There are many other reasons why as children we get angry but you get the picture, in fact if you sit here right now and think about it, you could probably come up with a score of others.
We don’t like to admit it but when we get angry we have horrible, mean thoughts, we want to retaliate and hurt those who have hurt us. Sometimes we do, mostly we don’t because as children we are not allowed to be angry.
If we get angry our parents get angry and punish us for it. We are told to “Go to your room”, “You’ll get a good smack if you talk to me like that again”, “How dare you speak to me like that”, “Stop shouting and causing a scene”. Often we do get smacked. Anger begets anger!
So most children learn that showing anger does not pay, we don’t get rewarded for it, that we must learn to control our anger, to push it down so that we will become a ‘fit member of society’. Depending on our personality we swallow our rage, bite our tongue and go off sulking and brooding about all the things we’d like to do to whoever it was that made us angry. As our suppressed anger is not allowed to articulate itself, our swallowed rage increases with each rejection, humiliation, injustice or unfairness.
As children we don’t know our parents are training us to be decent citizens so we say, “It’s not fair” a lot. We also think bitter and vengeful thoughts. If we don’t get what we want, instead of throwing the tantrum in Isle 3 of the supermarket knowing we will get punished for it, we think things like “I hate them”, “They never let me have anything I want, “They are really mean to me”, “I wish they were dead” sort of thoughts.
We’re too young to understand the power these thoughts have in future terms as our logic brain is not hard-wired yet, I have never seen a child over 6 throw a tantrum in a supermarket – have you? So the threats and punishments must have worked – yet these thoughts and feelings become our beliefs and are programmed in our subconscious mind and become part of the story we invent about our parents and our childhood to carry with us into the future. - See Part 2. http://happiness-beyond-belief.com/what-are-beliefs/angry-part-2/
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Our ‘Emmote’ process works deep at cellular level by totally eliminating the ‘negative thoughts and feelings’ that create a ‘negative belief’. It also severs the hardwired synapses in our brain between the thought and the feelings, eliminating them. Completely! Permanently!
If needed you will be able to recall the incident but not the feelings attached to it. It can no longer ‘trigger’ the feelings because they are no longer there! Enabling you to move forward into your new, more positive life.
And because we teach you how to use the ‘Emmote’ process we empower you with the knowledge and tools to help yourself whenever anything negative comes up for you in the future.
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©Annie Moyes –January 2013- All rights reserved
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