Love & Marriage

In the past 40 years, marriage has changed more than in the last 5,000

The ‘Big Day’ is just weeks away and you’re panicking, you’re imagining the worst will happen, perhaps getting ‘cold feet’ and wondering if this ‘getting married’ business is worth all the trouble and expense. Before one of the most important days of our lives I think it might be expedient to reflect on why so many people feel so nervous about it.

Perhaps it’s because the latest divorce statistics seem to reflect that marriage seems to be taken less seriously than buying a house. And buying a new car seems to be more logically and carefully thought out than choosing the right partner!  Twenty-three of the world’s wealthiest countries record a shocking 38 - 55% of marriages ending in divorce, with Belarus, Finland, Sweden, Norway and Luxemburg recording the highest percentage at between 50-55%. India, Armenia, Albania, Italy, Sri Lanka and Turkey come in with lowest rates of between 1-10%. Looking at the statistics perhaps there’s is indeed something in the old saying about ‘money not buying happiness?’ With such statistics, it’s no wonder that we feel so much anxiety about our upcoming nuptials.

Perhaps it could be that we realise that we just don’t know our intended partner well enough to make a lifetime commitment, or that our expectations of what marriage is ‘supposed to look like’ is based not on reality but on ancient belief systems and fairy tales. Also if we come from a family where our parents divorced we might be scared the same thing will happen to us and we worry about whether we’ve chosen the right person to commit to.

Another reason so many of us still choose marriage over cohabitation might be that the relationships of couples who just ‘live together’ are more fragile and are far more inclined to break down than legal marriages because there is no real commitment to make it work.  Startling statistics also prove that children of couples who ‘cohabitate’ are more at risk of sexual and physical abuse by live-in step-parents and are more likely to get into trouble or run away from home than their friends whose parents are legally married.

So why do women put themselves under so much pressure to have the biggest, best and most expensive wedding they can afford, or even going in debt for it, spending more time and energy thinking about a wedding dress than considering the consequences of a lifetime ‘having and holding’ the same person through thick and thin, even hiring a ‘Wedding Planner’ to co-ordinate the event. It’s a shame we don’t employ ‘A Marriage Councillor” before getting married!

Most men would be happy with a Registry Office or a Marriage Celebrant with a few friends to help them celebrate, so why do most women still buy into into the fairytale of Cinderella and Prince Charming and the expectations of what a wedding day ‘should look like’ and even now believe that without the huge spectacle attached to it she is inferior, a throwback to the days not so long ago when the husband ‘owned’ the wife and was always considered more important?

If you’re getting married soon and are having some doubts, it might be worthwhile to eliminate as many negative beliefs as you can before you take your wedding vows, so that you can have not only have the ‘Wedding of your Dreams’ without stress and anxiety, and go into your marriage completely sure that you have chosen your life’s partner and are committed to making it work.

If you would like to know more about how ‘ to get rid of your ‘negative prediction’ beliefs you can buy a copy of our e-book; ‘Wealth - Beyond Belief’ for just $21.50- which contains everything you need to know about ‘Emmote’ - and start getting rid of your negative beliefs RIGHT NOW!

If you would prefer to see if ‘Emmote ’is right for you, use our Contacts Form to write to us. You have nothing to lose except not becoming part of the latest divorce statistics!

 

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